With Womens Day around coming up next week, we thought it’s a great time to tune into moms needs. Motherhood can at times be a remarkable journey filled with immeasurable joy and love, but it also comes with its fair share of challenges and demands. From juggling countless responsibilities to constantly putting others’ needs before their own, moms often find themselves stretched thin, with a lack of support, often impacted by the social construct of the ‘Super-Mom’ myth. In the midst of all the chaos, it’s important to remember that for the entire families overall harmony, happiness and well-being, mom’s are going to need a break. Not just to the toilet either.
The concept of the supermom has been a recent introduction and has over the last 100 years become deeply ingrained in our collective consciousness. Portrayed as a woman who flawlessly balances her professional career, family, and personal life, the supermom myth embodies an unattainable standard of perfection. It’s time to challenge this destructive stereotype and recognize that no one can be expected to do it all without experiencing the consequences of burnout, stress, and emotional exhaustion. The supermom myth places an immense burden on women, setting unrealistic expectations that can be detrimental to their well-being and acting as a mental barrier to those who might have otherwise helped and exhausted moms who feel disappointed in themselves if they allow help. Over the last 3 decades , we know that stress has the same effect on the body as physical illness, which impacts emotional wellness, which in turn etc in a cyclical fashion, and that Motherhood is a demanding role. Each child requires the input of 2.5 times the average full-time job. that requires time, energy, and emotional investment.
Society often unrealistically expects mothers to effortlessly manage a full-time job, maintain a spotless home, engage in their children’s activities, prepare nutritious meals, and look picture-perfect, all while maintaining an active social life. Such expectations are not only impossible but also unfair. The pressure to be a supermom takes a significant toll on mental health. Constantly striving for perfection and fearing judgment can lead to anxiety, self-doubt, and feelings of inadequacy and even depression. Many mothers internalize the belief that they are failing if they are unable to meet these unattainable standards, neglecting their own needs and sacrificing their well-being in the process. Often many mothers don’t have a choice, particularly in case of single moms. Attempting to balance multiple roles simultaneously without support or self-care is simply unsustainable. The supermom myth fails to acknowledge that mothers are human beings with limitations, needs, and imperfections. It is essential to recognize that it is not only acceptable but also necessary for mothers to ask for help, set boundaries, and prioritize their own well-being.
Self-care is often seen as a luxury that moms cannot afford. However, it is precisely during times of high stress and overwhelming responsibilities that self-care becomes even more crucial. Taking time for oneself is not selfish but rather a form of self-preservation and ergo of the family and all of its constituents. Engaging in activities that promote relaxation, self-reflection, and personal growth can replenish a mother’s emotional resources, increase resilience, and ultimately benefit both her and her family. One of the most effective ways to debunk the supermom myth is by fostering a supportive environment for mothers. Encouraging open conversations about the challenges of motherhood, providing resources and support networks, and promoting work-life balance are essential steps in dismantling this harmful myth. Partners, family members, family support providers like a PA, chef, babysitter or au pair, and friends can play a pivotal role by actively sharing responsibilities, offering assistance, and providing emotional support.
Perhaps socially redefining what success means for mothers is a good starting point. Instead of measuring and judging them by how well a woman adheres to the supermom myth, perhaps we should rather be considering her ability to prioritize her well-being, maintain healthy relationships, and find fulfillment in her own unique journey. Sure, each mother’s path is different, and true success lies in finding a balance that aligns with her values, needs, and aspirations. It’s crucial to celebrate the imperfections and recognize that making mistakes is a natural part of the process. Embracing imperfection may allow mothers to let go of unrealistic expectations and focus on what truly matters – the love, care, and nurturing they provide to their children.
The supermom myth places an unfair and overwhelming burden on mothers, setting unrealistic expectations that can be detrimental to their well-being. It’s time to dispel this illusion of perfection and acknowledge that no one can do it all without sacrificing their own mental health and happiness, promoting self-care, fostering supportive environments.
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